MONTH 5: THE PLOT THICKENS

IS THE HONEYMOON OVER????

well, after relative safari njema bliss (safe journey bliss), the great adventure came to 

a screeching halt for your intrepid Citizen Of The World (aka: COTW). the local immigration

bureau has put the hammer down on COTW for basic needs. here's the backstory...

IT ALL STARTED WITH A PRADO

back in october before i went to ethiopia i bought a 1998 SUV Toyota Prado. navy blue. lots

of plastic trim. to buy a car here you get the log book that goes with the car. so the old owner

gives you his log book. transfers it to you. the first hitch is you need a PIN number to properly

register the car and transfer the log book. plus the KRA (revenue authority) has to to reissue

you the log book after you them the book and your PIN number.

they say...you can get you PIN online in 2 shakes. negative, ghost rider, the pattern is full.

no go. so my advocate said to go to the govt. tower with my passport. no biggie. walk in

get your PIN. see, my car insurance folks have been nagging me about this PIN and new

log book for months. i've tried to tell them that COTW has been too busy on global assignment

to get my PIN sorted, but they weren't impressed. no PIN-y, no tick-y. no insurance.

so time is of the essence. one problem, govt. building guy says my passport is NG for a PIN.

i need an "Alien Card". go to this other govt house and get the alien card, then come back

and get your PIN. 2 minutes with an alien card to get my PIN number.

i went to the other building, stood in line, she started handing me the alien card

application forms. 24 bucks, wait 6 weeks, presto. then and saw my latest entry visa dated jan 9, 2012. from cape town. on holiday!

then the wheels came off. several hitches here...with lots of different intel. and no real

answers. 

suddenly you can't get an alien card unless you've been in the country for 3 months. but i 

moved here oct 1, i explained. sorry mzungu kubwa (big white fella), this entry visa says

jan 9. but i was on holiday i protested. hakuna shida yangu. not my problem, was the reply.

so she sent me to another line and the next lady gave me a visa extension form. don't think

i need that, i whispered. just fill it out snarled the civil servant who wasn't paying attention to

me anyway. so i filled it out, re-cue-ed, and she stamped my passport with a 90 day visa

extension. then she saw the jan 9 entry, rolled her eyes, and got out the delete rubber stamp

and pounded my fresh visa extension with delete rubber stamps. i timidly offered i was there

for an alien card. quickly explained the prado situation. she literally said not my problem.

but but but...crickets.

ENTER HUMPHREY

so now lorella (my local asst, photo below) and i get back in the car with our driver Humphrey

(prado is getting a bush makeover). humphrey says he knows william who "fixed" is passport

for 3000 bob or $36 USD. maybe he could fix my alien card sorrows. why not? then the

mzungu price...william wants 20,000 bob or $240. not $36. hmmmmmmmmm. Lo and i decide

to wait on william.

enter "The Advocate"

turns out Lo's uncle is an advocate, a lawyer who is on your side. we met him. his price?

500,000KES, or $6000. WTF!?!?!?! i thought he was an advocate! i thought he was supposed 

to be on my side! turns out his price included a work visa that normally is 100,000KES or $1200 

and good for 2 years. but he said the govt fee was 240,000bob, or $3000, then to 

expedite it in 18-40 business days, it was another 260,000 bob, or another $3000! but 

wait a minute, 40 business days is 8 bloody weeks! this big white fella isn't that stupid!

so we passed on the good uncle who had his big mitts out looking for his payday.

but what is what? do you have to have a work visa to get an alien card? negative. pippa

just got her card with her UK passport and the application forms and 2000bob, or $24.

on a tourist visa. but its been 8 weeks and she still doesn't have it yet. hmmmmm.

at his point william at $240 is looking pretty good, but is it legit? real? authentic? humphrey

says yeah. it's all good. all legit. i would go down to pick it up. but once we explain i haven't

been here for 90 days, will his price go up??? 

ENTER POLLY

the latest fixer on the horizon is Polly. she "does immigration". but without a work visa? i don't

want to drop $1200 for a work visa to get a $24 dollar alien card. (although i do need

a work visa and would probably take it if i can afford polly). don't know polly's price yet,

Lo is calling her today. muy better having a local deal with local. (less "white tax").

THE LAST HITCH

the last hitch is that if i do it myself, and it does in actual fact require being here for 90

days to get your alien card, then we're looking at april 9 to apply, then 6-8 weeks to get 

it. so the lag time would be june 9 to get my alien card so i can get my PIN number so I can

get my log book in order. and registered with the KRA. BUT...COTW may be going to southern

sudan early march for a week, returning march 11. then the new entry visa says march 11 and 

with lag time we're talking what now...august 9th??? feeling me???

so a fixer would be helpful, but at what price? and we they get half way done "fixing it"

and come back needing more money cuz it's harder than the thought??????? with no

recourse on my end?????? that's the thing, the govt is a hassle and even the advocates want 

to rip you off. who to trust? how to proceed? what is really the truth??? what is really

required??? i spun me out. rejection followed by statutory exploitation. i was fuming and

defeated. if i keep working out of the country, COTW will never get his alien card or his PIN

or his log book or his insurance! i'm stuffed!

ALT OPTION: FLY HOME???????

it was the first time i felt like taking my toys and flying home. screw y'all! but i can't! i own a

prado! and i can't sell it without a log book! see how dizzying it gets! and it's either gonna

take 6-8 weeks assuming they'll take my application (i'm trying again thursday to stand in line)

or 3-5 months if i have to wait 90 days first. and NOT take the sudan gig. so stuffed. i'm stuck!!

unless i can afford the right fixer i suppose. but why do they have to play me like that???

i feel powerless and pissed. you don't want me here, you gonna make it impossible to be here,

fine, i'll fly home. sayonara! i'm sick of y'all anyway! and that's what happens, months of all

the little frustrations of living in a 3rd world country all erupt when you get jerked around.

played by the systems. i hate rules anyways, and these are a lot of petty rules. with no

recourse. not there problem. but can't you see i'm spending way more money here than your

average joe and i'm good for your economy??? hook a mzungu up!!!!!!!! fat chance.

so that's the immigration drama. chasing my tail. no solid answers or solutions. and don't

know how to proceed. and add to that the stress of moving into the interim place before i

get "The Stable". and also just found out i need an interim after the interim as the stable

won't be ready til april 1. lots of schlepping. we all hate moving.

so it's been a trying few weeks. stay tuned...."as africa turns"...

now for some pics...but first check out some new vids from the past 2 weeks.

http://vimeo.com/35889816

http://vimeo.com/35709946

http://vimeo.com/35784893

some mama's beading at Dignity Design. see the vid above...#3.

"The Stable"...won't be ready til april 1 

more stable. 

mark davies from UK, waiting to move out of the stable into a new place on the compound that isn't ready yet. 

looking up from the patio mark is on. 

reverse angle. 

gotta love the dutch doors. 

back deck 

back side 

worker on street on the compound out the back. 

great textures. 

old school cowboy meets africa. 

rustic bliss 

future home of slingshot edit bay at the stable 

bigger kitchen is way nice! 

lots o light! 

another view! 

the yard 

the yard II 

lorella, my assistant, aka LO, gave me her "sad chicken plucker" look for my friend in LA whose
shooting a doco here this month and needs to cast a chicken plucker lady. Lo has plucked
100s of em, her boyfriend has a kuku business (chicken business).

ladder in the BG for the 6 hour lighting hang i did last saturday to light the karen vineyard space at
hillcrest school. reminds me webster!  

prado getting the bush makeover. 

stripped and going to be burly! 

 safari green with a tan top.

and roof hatches! for game watching! 

seats are going new coverings and the old carpet came out so we can paint in liner-bed protector and
hose out the mud!
 

oh yeah, my lawyer has to write a letter saying i painted my navy blue prado green. geeesh.

"a proper bull bar", not made in china! 

the interim place. 

7 acres of gardens.

12 foot sunflower! african size!

my own entrance. every i own in that room.

looking out my room. nice and big and lots o light and the shower is awesome!!!!!!!!!!!

very cool palms. poa sana!

all for now!!!!!!!! stay tuned....

xxxoooo

COTW